EMOTIONAL, SOCIAL AND RELATIONSHIP ISSUES Part II

How do I explain vitiligo to people? Should I even bother?We suggest that you be honest and open, and explain to people that vitiligo is a genetic condition, in which the body's immune system sees pigment cells as foreign bodies, and attacks them. Explain that it is a rather common condition, that it does not hurt or itch, and that it is not contagious. Finally, explain to them that treatment technology for the condition is improving, and that genetic advances may one day solve the condition. No matter who they are, everyone can identify with genetic ailments, such as cancer, leukemia, multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s, and other conditions. When they realize that this is a condition just like every other miserable condition humans inherit, they are less likely to be afraid of it. I have a child with vitiligo. What should I do? Children usually cope best with vitiligo when their parent(s) is/are prepared to talk about the condition as openly and truthfully as possible. To pretend you haven't noticed something so obvious may make it difficult for your child to talk to you about it. Because this is often so difficult for parents to cope with, especially as relates to other children, it is important to talk with teachers, and counselors, and to be conscious if your child is being teased or bullied. Support your child, and encourage them to get involve with activities and hobbies. Teach them that it is OK to be different, and that it doesn't make them any less important. A wonderful book for children to read, is Lori Mitchell's "Different Just Like Me" which teaches children that there are many different people in the world, and that they really are very much alike, despite their obvious differences.I am afraid I might lose my job because of my vitiligo. What should I do? Under various laws, most Americans (and people in many other countries) are protected from discrimination in their work or from being fired based on medical conditions or illness. If you feel that you have been discriminated against because of your vitiligo, then you should consult an attorney specializing in labor and employment law.I'm afraid my spouse or significant other won't be attracted to me because of my vitiligo. What should I do? Relationship issues are without question one of the most important social problems that come up with vitiligo. People with vitiligo are frequently concerned that they will no longer be attractive to their significant others, partners or spouses. What we find to be the case most often, is that the partners of people with vitiligo are often times not terribly concerned about the vitiligo, and often say that it does not bother them. More often, we find that any relationship problems that arise are often created by the vitiligo-affected partner. So learn to communicate with your partner or spouse, express your concerns and fears, and LISTEN. Another possibility is to make yourself attractive in other ways. Pay attention to your hair, work out, have your teeth fixed. Skin does not always have to be the focal point. Counseling with a licensed therapist concerning your relationship issues (either alone or with your partner or spouse) can also be invaluable here.I feel self-conscious and uncomfortable at places like the beach or swimming pools. What can I do? Don't avoid the beach or swimming pools just because of your vitiligo. Do not allow vitiligo to interfere with the joy of living. From a physical aspect, it may make sense to go swimming and to the beach in the later afternoons, when the sun is not as strong. If it makes you feel better, wear stain or waterproof makeup cover. And if people ask about the vitiligo, you should explain it to them just as indicated above.How do I find a good counselor or psychotherapist to help me with the emotional issues? Physicians and friends and family are all good sources for referral to a therapist. As with all professionals, personal referrals are often the most valuable. Second to that, you should try to find a therapist who has experience in counseling people with medical conditions or conditions which affect their appearance. These types of therapists may be able to explore with you ways to deal with vitiligo, both inwardly and socially, and can work with you to maintain your self-esteem and pride.